


in which they're both idiots (but what else is new?)

by stagecrime



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Muggle, Fluff, M/M, POV switch, Swearing, do NOT come at me about the height difference, implied not great family situation??, mad eye moody as a bus driver is so fucking funny to me, remus lupin has never and will never be able to drive a car
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-12
Updated: 2020-11-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:20:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27529102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stagecrime/pseuds/stagecrime
Summary: Exactly what the title says.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 10
Kudos: 92





	in which they're both idiots (but what else is new?)

**Author's Note:**

> wolfstar high school/college minifest day eight: vacations
> 
> enjoy!!

Alastor “Mad-Eye” Moody had never been a very good bus driver, at the best of times. At the worst of times, he was fucking terrible. That being said, he’d never crashed, or put a single student in any real danger. He was the kind of driver who took traffic laws as suggestions, scared the living shit out of you, but you’d trust to keep everyone safe with your life, if against your better judgment. He was actually surprisingly careful about other cars. And the occasional deer.

Remus Lupin was somewhat of the opposite. His driving style was similar; he’d never slow down at turns, or, fuck, stop signs, but had gotten more driving tickets than he could technically afford and was never the person you’d volunteer to drive the group.

Which was why he usually took the bus. Usually.

Remus hopped from foot to foot, gritting his teeth. Where was that damned bus? He was already almost twenty minutes late getting out of the house, and the fact that the bus was supposed to arrive half an hour ago wasn’t exactly helping matters.

 _Five minutes_ , Remus told himself. _Five minutes, and then you can beg Mom for a ride to school._

-

Meanwhile, on the other side of town, Sirius Black was also late, albeit for an entirely different reason. He was frantically searching for his missing, or else hiding, English homework.

Sirius’ little brother, Regulus, stood in the doorway of Sirius’ room, snickering. “You don’t mean to tell me you...lost your homework.”

Sirius groaned. “Dog probably ate it. And good morning to you too.”

“You’re the only dog here, Siri.” Regulus, still snickering, watched Sirius practically disappear under his bed. “You didn’t eat it, did you?”

“Oh, fuck you.”

“You love me.”

Sirius just sighed, restraining a smile.

-

_Well, that’s that then,_ Remus thought to himself, sighing. _It’s been five minutes — no, nearly ten minutes now. And the bus still isn’t here._

Remus was sort of relieved, if he was being honest with himself. (Which he wasn’t.) The bus could be a scary place. Hell, Mad-Eye, that godawful bus driver, could be scary. And, evidently, both of them were missing. Remus took a deep breath, then walked back toward his front door, shouting for his mother.

Appearing in the doorway, Hope Lupin did not look happy. In the least.

“What are you doing still here?”

“The bus is late. I need a ride. Please.”

Hope sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, although Remus could see the faint smile on her face. “Why can’t you drive? Don’t you have a license?”

“Well, it’s not a real license, I’m only sixteen, and either way I’m not exactly a great driver-“

“Oh, now, none of that. I’ll bet you’re a great driver.”

“Have you never seen me drive?”

Silently, Hope shook her head. Remus raised an eyebrow in response.

“But how bad can you really be?” Hope tapped her foot. “Look, I’m going to be late. Take Dad’s car. Love you!” And with that, she disappeared back into the house, leaving Remus to stare behind her.

She really had no idea about his nonexistent driving skills. How he’d gotten his learner’s permit, he had no idea.

Not finding any better option, Remus resigned himself to grabbing his backpack off the floor and walking to his dad’s Sedan.

-

“Found it!” Sirius grinned triumphantly, holding a crumpled worksheet above his head. “Reg, I found it!”

“I see that. Congratulations?” Regulus furrowed his brow, obviously trying not to laugh. “Anyway, you’re really going to be late now.” He pointed across the hall to the grandfather clock, ticking ominously.

Sirius blinked. “Shit.”

Regulus snorted.

“Don’t you have school today?”

“Nope. Have the day off.”

“What?! Why? That’s not fair,” Sirius said indignantly.

“You know, Sirius, dear brother of mine, there is a concept called age? In which I am younger than you? And still in eighth grade? Where there are more holidays?”

Sirius sighed. “Smartass. God, I miss middle school.”

“No, you fucking don’t.”

Sirius gave Regulus’ retreating, still laughing back the finger as he tried not to laugh.

-

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Remus muttered to himself as he backed out of the driveway. “Why did Mom think this was going to be a good idea again?” Looking around to make sure he wasn’t going to hit any unsuspecting pedestrians, he swore again. He had been on the road barely thirty seconds before he heard a shout.

Remus sighed. He didn’t exactly have time for this, but...how could he say no?

This person, whoever they were, could only be described as _hot as hell_. Black hair, perfect skin… the whole package. They even looked about his age. But what was Remus supposed to do? The mystery person was standing right there, on the curb, looking desperate.

Remus finally slowed down, groaning internally. “Do you need a ride?”

-

The boy - Sirius, his name turned out to be - did need a ride. One that Remus was less than happy to give to him, although he did anyway, because he couldn’t just ask and then when Sirius said yes, drive right past him.

At least they were both going to the same place (the local high school) and the same part of it (north campus, sophomore hall). It wouldn’t be any trouble. Any physical trouble, anyway. Emotional anguish was different.

Remus took a deep breath and opened the passenger door.

-

Sirius couldn’t believe his luck. When he’d gotten out of the house late, he’d expected to have to walk to school, be in trouble with Minnie, and probably get a detention, although he was used to those. But here he was, in the passenger seat, getting a ride to school with who was possibly the most adorable boy he had ever seen.

He’d told him his name and where he wanted to go, although the other boy - the _adorable_ one - hadn’t told him his, though Sirius presumed (hoped) they were going to the same place.

Maybe he was just paranoid.

“So, what’s your name?” Sirius needed to know something, after all, if he wanted to score a date, and a name was the least he could tell him. The other boy, however, just sat and stared at the windshield, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. The car hadn’t moved since Sirius had gotten in it, and Sirius worried that meant he was waiting for him to get back out. He had offered to give him a ride, though. So maybe not.

After a while, the other boy finally answered, “Remus. Remus Lupin.”

Sirius smiled. _Remus._ He liked the sound of that.

“This was a stupid idea.”

“What?” Sirius asked. “What’s a stupid idea?”

“Listen - to be frank, I’m a fucking terrible driver. But I guess you’re stuck with me now.”

Sirius laughed.

“It’s no laughing matter.”

“Oh, we’ll see about that.” Sirius gestured to the road. “Don’t kill us, though.”

“No promises.”

-

Remus spent the entire car drive a) trying not to make a fool of himself in front of this other random person, Sirius, while b) getting to know him (which had nothing - absolutely nothing - to do with how _fucking_ hot he was) , and c) not getting them killed, or worse, arrested. Being arrested seemed more like something Sirius would do.

Which was all harder than it looked. Remus really was a horrible driver, even though he’d never actually crashed. Traffic tickets, however, he could probably set a record for.

-

Sirius, on the other hand, spent the entire car drive trying to make conversation, which proved harder than it seemed.

“So...are you going to the school too?”

“Yes,” Remus said, shortly. Sirius sighed internally.

“Are you a student there?”

Remus was silent. Sirius looked over at him, thinking. He was pretty tall…

“Teacher?”

Remus choked. “No! Student. I’m sixteen.”

“What?! You’re so tall! What, five-”

“Six-two,” Remus interrupted.

Sirius gaped.

“And if you keep talking to me I’m _definitely_ going to crash this car, and we don’t want that.”

“...No. We don’t want that. Proceed, kind sir, with your god-awful driving.”

Remus snorted.

-

It was a Monday. It was _definitely_ a Monday. Where was everyone?

The parking lot was empty - almost empty. The only car, besides Remus’, was a dusty red Beetle that sat in the farthest parking space from the entrance and Remus identified as belonging to the janitor.

Remus blinked.

Closing his mouth, he looked over at Sirius. “What the fuck?”

Sirius shook his head slowly, mouth open. “No idea. Wait, I’ll-” Shrugging his backpack off, he opened the passenger door and jumped out, leaving Remus to stare after him.

-

Sirius jogged toward the light-up message board in front of the school, trying to read what it said. He could hear Remus calling his name, confused as to where he was going - and _fuck,_ his name _did_ sound good when Remus said it - but _no, not now, Black, idiot_ \- and now he’d gotten distracted and was going the wrong way. Fuck.

When he finally reached the huge board over his head, he stepped back to read it.

**_To All Students: School Off Today! Enjoy your 3-day weekend!_ **

Sirius’ jaw dropped.

-

It was hard to see from inside the car, but it looked like Sirius was staring up, shielding his eyes from the late-morning sun, at the huge message board - and he looked confused, that was it. Really, really confused.

“Remus!”

“What?” Remus shouted back at Sirius, more than a little confused. Sirius was still staring up above his head.

“...Come look at this, will you?” Sirius almost seemed to be laughing slightly, but it didn’t look like he thought it was funny.

Remus only hesitated a moment before opening the car door and jogging toward Sirius, not bothering to turn the car off (or close the door, for that matter.) “Something happen?”

“You could say that,” Sirius sighed, gesturing at the board. Remus stepped back, looked up, and-

“What the fuck?”

Sirius laughed.

“Did you know about this?”

“No...did you?” Sirius hadn’t stopped laughing.

“Fuck no.”

“This is ridiculous.”

Now Remus was laughing as well. “Yup.” Making eye contact, he jerked his head back toward the still-running car, a question on his lips.

Sirius just nodded, grinning.

-

“Back home?” They were back in the car, sitting in the parking lot.

Sirius nodded, still smiling. “Back home.”

They drove mostly in silence (expect for one time when Remus almost hit a tree and Sirius screamed, but, well, other than that.)

The ride was short (or so it seemed), but by the time they got back to Sirius’ house, he could hear his parents, moving around from the direction of the kitchen. Fuck.

“Hey...Remus?” Sirius swallowed. This could either go great, or terribly.

“Yeah?” Remus turned his head toward Sirius, and he was smiling. Good sign.

Sirius took a breath.“I don’t...my parents are awake.”

Remus nodded slowly.

“And...I don’t really feel like...well, I don’t think they’d be very happy if they found out I’d be home all day.” Sirius’ heart felt like it was beating out of his chest, but he was relieved when Remus immediately nodded, eyes wide. Sirius grinned.

-

Remus couldn’t say he understood what it was like to not be able to go home - home? Did Sirius consider it home? - but he did know that he could help. “You want to stay here? Or we could go...back to my place.” Fuck. That sounded like a date. He wasn’t asking for a date. He wasn’t looking for a date.

Was he?

Either way, he wasn’t going to take advantage of this situation.

“Yeah - yeah, that would be great. Thank you,” Sirius rushed out, looking genuinely grateful. 

Remus nodded, smiling. “Of course.”

Still, neither boy moved to get out of the car, choosing to just stare at each other instead.

Remus caved first. “Do you want to…” He waved in the vague direction of the house.

Sirius nodded quickly, tearing his eyes off Remus’ face to the ground. “Yeah. Of course.”

He hadn’t stopped smiling. And he still hadn’t moved from his seat.

Standing, Remus finally turned off the car and opened the door. “You all right?”

Sirius seemed to shake himself. “Yeah. Good. I’m good.”

Remus chuckled. “You sure about that?”

Sirius blushed.

-

“Race you.”

“What?” Remus said.

Sirius grinned. “Race you to the front door.” And with that, he took off running, dragging his backpack.

Remus snorted. “You little-” He lunged out, but missed, and started laughing. “Sirius!”

Sirius stopped at the door, reaching out and grabbing the frame. “I win!”

“Oh my god.”

“What?” Sirius’ smirk grew.

Remus didn’t answer, just laughed and walked toward him. “Wow. You got a head start, you know.”

Sirius just looked smug. “I do know. And I won.”

Remus snorted. “Fair enough.” He was standing next to Sirius now, arm pressed to Sirius’ side.

And, well, if this was what being late was going to be like, then Sirius really needed to be late more often.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm...not entirely sure what this was supposed to be
> 
> come say hi on tumblr [@silversickles](https://silversickles.tumblr.com) :)


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